Find out what age you should be looking for your soul mate.
Finding your soulmate is more about timing than anything else. As the years go by, our needs change, as do our interests, making it hard to find someone who matches everything we want from a partner.
However, when we’re younger, we tend to have fewer expectations regarding compatibility, while at the same time, we also don’t know how long we’ll be single. So what age do you need to start finding your soulmate?
The Good News
Before we get into the details, let’s remember that there isn’t one correct answer to this question. Some people say they found their soulmate when they were 21 or 22; others claim they met theirs at 27 or 28, and many others somewhere in between.
We all see things differently and come up with different ideas about what makes us happy in relationships. So if you’re reading this article, I’m going to assume that you’ve already decided that you want to find your soulmate someday, and we’ll focus on how old you should be.
The Bad News
While there’s no hard-and-fast rule for when you should stop hoping for love and start settling down with someone, many experts agree that once you hit 30, you should give up on finding your soulmate because we all know that most relationships end after that point. However, there are exceptions to every rule.
Finding the Right Time to Take a Chance on Love
There’s not much wrong with waiting until you’re older to take the plunge into dating. After all, you can still meet great people well into your 30s. But if you’re over 30 now and you feel like you might be ready to settle down, then it’s worth thinking about whether you’re making the right choice.
If you’ve been on plenty of dates without any luck, you might consider whether you should keep looking. And if you haven’t had much success recently but haven’t given up yet, then perhaps you should consider giving yourself a break and trying again in six months or so.
While you needn’t rush into marriage or even serious relationships, you may want to give dating another shot before you decide to put all your eggs in one basket.
Soul Mates Are Born, Not Made
This article may lead you to believe that you need to be young to find your soulmate, but the truth is that you don’t have to be. Studies show that most couples who marry each other first met in college, and those who met in high school didn’t necessarily marry each other either. So it seems that age doesn’t matter as much as we thought it did.
That said, it probably helps to start early. One study showed that only 5% of people who meet their soulmates in their 20s marry them.
Another survey found that about 50% of people who meet their soulmates in their late teens match them, compared to 65% of people who meet them in their 20s. So if you want to be married someday, you’d better start sooner rather than later.
A Little Bit of Luck Goes A Long Way
Suppose you meet your soulmate when you’re younger; good for you! But the rest of us need to start earlier to take advantage of our chances.
“I would say that if you’re in your 20s, I recommend getting involved,” says Dr. John Grey, co-author of the book “Love Rules.” “By being in a relationship, you can learn more about yourself, figure out what you like and don’t like, and be more confident in your personality and abilities.”
Even if you don’t meet your soulmate when you’re young, he adds, the best way to succeed at dating is to spend lots of time talking to people. “Try to talk to everyone,” he says. “You never know where someone will turn out to be important.”
Of course, if you don’t have a chance to date anyone, you won’t be able to pick up these valuable lessons quickly. But that’s why it’s always a good idea to surround yourself with friends and family who aren’t afraid to tell you the truth.
Don’t Be Afraid To Ask For Help When It Comes to Finding The One
One of the biggest mistakes people make is assuming that they’re supposed to know what they want and how to find it. But as we’ve seen, it doesn’t work quite that way.
“The real problem is that we don’t ask ourselves enough questions,” says Dr. Grey. “We don’t ask ‘what do I want?’ because we want something specific. We don’t ask, ‘how do I want that, and what does that look like?’ We should be asking that more often.”
So if you feel stuck, try asking yourself questions like “What will make me happy?” “Who am I attracted to?” and “why do I want to be with him/her?”. This way, you can discover what you want instead of getting caught up in picking someone out.
And if you happen to stumble across someone you think fits the bill, don’t jump in headfirst. Instead, give it a little time before deciding whether you want to pursue a relationship with them.
Be Patient and Have Faith in Yourself
When you meet someone, you think is perfect for you; it’s easy to fall in love and completely forget your needs. But as we’ve established, you shouldn’t rush into anything, even though the temptation is strong. Patience is the key to happiness here, so don’t rush into any decisions.
Plus, remember that you’re not alone in this world. Plenty of other people would love nothing more than to find their soulmate — you need to be patient and open to possibilities.
“If you have someone you love, you’re likely to overlook problems with the person,” says Dr. Grey. “If you’re with someone who loves you, you will overlook their faults.”
Take Advantage Of Opportunities That Present Themselves, Even If They Involve Meeting People Who Don’t End Up Being “Meant” For Each Other.
In general, you want to approach dating with an open mind, so you can meet new people and test different situations. But you don’t want to be too open-minded; otherwise, you may miss opportunities to meet someone special for yourself.
“It’s not bad to meet many people,” says Dr. Grey. “But if you tend to meet many people only to lose interest in them, you may not end up meeting someone who’s meant for you. If you can avoid that, then it’s great.”
If you end up meeting someone who turns out to be terrible for you, well, that happens. But if you’re willing to meet many different people and take the time to consider each one, you could have a great time doing it.
It’s All About Timing
Now that we’ve looked at how you can find your soulmate, we need to address the final question of when to start looking for them. There’s no magic number, but most people feel that once you reach 30, it’s time to slow things down a bit.
“At the risk of sounding pessimistic, I think it’s probably best to wait until your mid-30s before you start actively pursuing a romantic relationship,” says Dr. Grey. “Many people delay marriage until around 40 or 45, even though they started dating at 25. If you want to be married someday, it’s probably best to wait.”
There’s value in waiting, which means taking your time and enjoying the freedom of being single. On the other hand, you also need to realize that you don’t have to wait forever. Some of us start dating in our early 20s, and some don’t even start dating until our mid-20s.
